How do you keep your bodily, energetic, and spiritual containers clean and clear for your clients? In Part One of this article, you learned what clarity can look like in the areas of Mind and Emotion, as well as some ways to maintain it. This week, we’ll focus on clearing the containers of the Body, Energy, and Spirit realms of your being.  

Body/Behavior

An unclear physical container might be one of the easiest to notice, as it affects you in the tangible realm. When your bodily container is clean and clear, you feel invigorated, active, and healthy. However, when your bodily container is cloudy, you may feel sluggishness, fatigue, or aches and pains.  

It’s easy to think this isn’t important for sex coaches, but that isn’t the case! Part of our work involves modeling the kind of lifestyle that benefits our clients. If you’re not looking after your physical health, it’s hard for your client to believe you when you advise them to do it.

How do you clear your bodily container?

Living a healthy life is key here. Pay attention to how certain foods, beverages, and substances make you feel. Do they fuel your body with clarity and good energy, or do they leave you feeling heavy or numbed out? This doesn’t mean you have to go without your favorite treats in life: just be aware of what you consume and how it affects your body, and choose from there.

Motion is also a fantastic way of keeping a clear bodily container. It’s good to move energy through your body with regular exercise that suits your interests, ability levels, and lifestyle. Chair yoga, a long walk, martial arts, swimming, body weight exercises, dancing, sex—get creative with the possibilities! Exercise is a key component in bonding with your body and actively showing it love and attention.  

If you live with a chronic health condition, fatigue, sluggishness, and aches and pains may just be a way of life. You can still work toward a clear bodily container by adhering to your treatment regimens and monitoring your attitude toward your body and your condition(s).

It’s important to have a healthy body image. Do you love your body, even when this may seem challenging? Do you work with and respect the limitations of your body and forgive it for things it may not be able to do? Having a healthy relationship with your body is arguably more important than physical health itself.

Energy

Keeping your energetic container clean and clear is one of the most important things you can do as a sex coach. When things are going well here, the energy dynamic in your personal and professional relationships is open, forward-moving, and aligned. You may express this as feeling “good vibes” or as having a good connection with your client. 

When your energetic container is cloudy, you might feel like there’s a wall between you and your client. It’s difficult to “get on the same page” or “see eye-to-eye” when the energy isn’t moving in a beneficial way.

How do you clear your energy?

To keep a clear energetic container, examine who and what you surround yourself with. This is especially true in your relationships: with your clients, with loved ones, colleagues, and—most importantly—with yourself. As Dr. Patti teaches, be on the lookout for “energy drainers” and “energy gainers.” What in your life fuels and refreshes you, and what leaves you feeling hollow and depleted?

For example, you may have a longtime friendship with someone you love deeply, but the person constantly complains and rarely seems happy, leaving you socially unsatisfied and ruminating on their concerns. 

If this crosses over into your work and affects the amount of energy you have to listen to a client who’s sought you out, consider what may be the best thing to do. This can be a difficult question to honestly answer, especially because it can come with making hard decisions about who and what you’re regularly spending time with. 

Remember: it’s your life, and you have the right to compromise and be as flexible as you want. You might decide to cut someone or something out of your life—permanently or for a little while—or you might decide to simply reduce the amount of time you spend on them. This is a good place to practice Marie Kondo’s famous advice: keep and make more room for things that bring you joy. 

Spirit

The final element is a clean spiritual container. When you’re feeling spiritually clear, you feel a strong connection between your deepest essential self and the divine greatness outside of you. This doesn’t have to be a specific deity or religious idea: rather, it’s something bigger outside of yourself that helps you find meaning and purpose in the world.

When you’re spiritually cloudy, you might lack that sense of connectedness and direction. You might feel unclear about your purpose in life, or doubt that you have a purpose at all. You might find yourself wondering, “What’s the point?” and feel a sense of bleakness, hopelessness, or even existential crisis.

How do you clear your spirit?

A spiritual practice of some kind can work wonders in your life. This might initially put you off, if you’re assuming you have to adopt a certain set of beliefs. However, the beauty of a spiritual practice is that it’s 100% your own creation. You’re free to explore, discover, and play around until you find something you can feel truly aligned with. 

If you don’t have a spiritual practice, are you willing to build one? To start, think of what greater force you feel a strong connection to. Some people call this God/Goddess, the Universe, Mother Earth, the Great Mystery, or simply the force that connects all living beings. 

If you prefer a more grounded approach, you might choose to connect to the various, inexplicable wonders of life, the world, and the human experience. The important thing is to have a sacred respect for something larger or higher than yourself.

With your respect for that greater force in mind, consider how to align yourself with it. How can you act in integrity with this force? What can you do to embody it and make it tangible for others in your life? How can you be a living example of this sacred, divine thing, even if only in a small way? Asking yourself powerful questions about how you want to impact the world is a great way to calibrate your spiritual compass. Doing so will give you the clarity you need to stay on your path.

The Importance of Clearing Your Container

MEBES Model, sex coaching, sex coach training

MEBES Wheel

These are just a few ways to use the MEBES© Wheel to expand your capacity to hold powerful space for your clients, your loved ones, and for yourself. Deepening, cleaning, and clearing your container is a crucial element in success as a sex coach. After all, big changes for your client can’t happen if there isn’t room for them to move, express, and grow freely.

What other ways can you think of to have the cleanest, clearest container possible? What daily practices do you use to stay grounded and aligned? We would love to hear about it! Let us know in our Facebook discussion group, Sex Matters. We can’t wait to see you there!