Do you want to achieve financial success? If you’re reading this article, then you are either working as a sex coach or in the process of pursuing your goal of becoming a sex coach. Odds are, in addition to fulfilling your dream of being a sex coach, you have an additional dream of financially supporting yourself in this occupation. I’m here to tell you it is 100% possible to achieve financial success as a sex coach!

I Have Achieved Financial Success as a Sex Coach

Let me introduce myself. For those of you who are not familiar with me, I’m Dr. Sonia Wright. I’m a medical doctor, a sexual counselor, a certified life coach, and a former sex toy store employee. I put all my experience, knowledge, and training together to create my unique brand of sex coaching as The Midlife Sex Coach for Women

I started my practice as a sex coach in January of 2019 and had my first paying client by March of 2019. But, let me also add that I had been working as a life coach for three years previously, and never charged my clients up until 2019! Obviously, I had a lot of mind drama around charging for my services. 

However, in 2019, I decided it was time to make some money. By the end of that year, I had made a total of $22k. Not bad, but I knew I could do even better if I could change my mindset. I was functioning from a place of fear and non-belief in my business and in myself. I knew something had to change in order for me to achieve my financial goals. 

Jump forward to the end of 2020 and I’m happy to say that a lot of things changed for me. By December of 2020, I had made over $170k in my business, and between July 2020 and June 2021, I made over $275k. 

So what changed in my business to make all the difference? 

Well, that’s what I want to discuss with you today. 

Success is Less About Strategy, More About Mindset

Everyone thinks achieving financial success is about strategy. You set a goal and then take steps 1, 2, and 3 to achieve it. Yes, perfecting your sex coaching services is important, and so is marketing, as well as having a good method of charging and collecting payments. 

But achieving your financial goals is less about strategy and so much more about your mindset throughout this process. It’s about evolving into another version of yourself. I call this evolution “The Uplevel.” 

So, what happens during “The Uplevel?” You get up close and personal with your current self, AKA your “Starter Self,” and you eventually become the person who achieves their financial goals, your “Super Self.” 

First, Believe in Yourself & Set a Goal

First of all, believe in yourself. Know that you can do this—you can achieve all of your financial goals. But you will probably have to evolve into the next version of yourself in order to do so. It’s another case of simple, but not easy. You must be willing to feel the discomfort and keep taking action even when you don’t feel like it. So, tell your “Starter Self” to buckle up and get ready for the journey of a lifetime.

Okay, if you still insist on steps for achieving financial success, then the first step is to set a financial goal and a time frame within which to achieve this goal.  Maybe it’s $100k in a year. Maybe it’s $50k in a year. You get to decide what’s good for you. What amount of money would you need to live comfortably for a year? That’s a good place to start in terms of a goal. 

Now, based upon how much you charge for your services, ask yourself if it is possible to obtain that goal within 12 months. If not, you might have to consider increasing your fees or get creative about the services that you provide. 

Now that you have set a goal, the fun begins. 

Questions to Ask your “Starter Self”

These next questions are some of the most important questions to ask yourself. These questions will help you with your evolution to becoming your “Super Self.” But beware, success is usually built on a pile of failures and this journey will likely be no different. There will be gains and losses, things that work and things that do not work. Basically trial and error. 

How you interpret these events will determine if you ultimately succeed or if you give up prematurely before you reach your goals. 

So, having established that this journey is about evolution and growth as well as achieving financial goals, here are the questions to ask your “Starter Self”:

  1. How do you want to show up in your business while you are working toward achieving this goal? Who will you be when things get tough?
  2. What do you choose to believe about yourself, your business, and the events that unfold along the journey?
  3. Do you believe you have the ability to achieve this goal?
  4. What will happen if you do not offer your services to your clients?
  5. What are you willing to consistently do for your business and your clients, no matter what?
  6. What systems do you need to build within your business to support yourself and your clients?
  7. How do you need to feel as you go through this journey? Basically, what emotions will motivate you to keep going when times get tough?

Get Comfortable With Discomfort

The secret to achieving your financial goals is recognizing it’s all about your mindset and being willing to feel discomfort. In fact, the best advice I can give you is to get comfortable with discomfort. I know you have heard this before, “All that you’re looking for in life is found outside of your comfort zone.” It’s true. Your ability to tolerate discomfort will determine your level of success. 

But don’t worry, you are not alone during this journey. Trust yourself. You actually have all the answers already and, more importantly, you have a mentor who will be there throughout your entire journey. Your path is uniquely yours alone, but your mentor personally knows this journey, because they have experienced it already. Your mentor is your future self, AKA your “Super Self.” Ask them how they went through the journey to their financial goal and they will tell you. 

Interview Your Future “Super Self”

This is where my life coaching skills come in. Really spend some time looking at your current thoughts and if these thoughts will serve you while you are growing your business. If not, ask your “Super Self” what they had to think during the journey to achieving their goals. Ask them what they had to feel in order to make the money. Maybe they needed to feel committed, or determined, or inspired. 

Then discover what thoughts they were thinking throughout the “Uplevel” process. Chances are the thought was something like, “This failure is getting me closer to my success.” Or perhaps, “This just means there is another way to achieve this goal.” 

Manifest Your Goals By Asking for What You Want

The journey to financial success and happiness

Photo by Lukas from Pexels

Once you get your thoughts and feelings in alignment with financial success, the next step is asking for what you want. You have to put your intention out into the world in order to manifest it. Some believe that asking sets manifestation powers in motion, others think it helps keep you focused on your results. You can choose the reason behind your asking. 

I personally believe it helps me get specific and connect with my Higher Power, through whom all things are manifested. Asking the universe is one thing, but also being practical and asking your clients for the money is important, too. Ask them for the opportunity to serve them. Offer your clients your services and believe your services are valuable and people will purchase.

Take Action to Manifest Financial Success

Finally, it is time to get into action. You realize there are many actions you need to take, some will work and others will not. Maybe you send out daily emails to your list, maybe you make guest appearances on podcasts, maybe you create informational workshops or write a daily blog, maybe you start your own podcast. 

Whatever your actions, just show up and keep showing up. Review what worked for you and what did not. 

When you get new clients, identify the source. How did the clients find out about you? 

Recognize that sometimes the money comes in right away and sometimes the time commitment and effort you put in now does not manifest as money until months or even years later. The secret is to keep going and recognize you are in the process of “The Uplevel.”

Be Open to Receiving Prosperity

Finally, be open to receiving your financial benefit. Don’t do all the hard work and then forget to expect the money to flow to you and receive it. If you don’t believe you deserve it, then you are blocking your own financial prosperity. That’s essentially like leaving your money on the table and walking away. Open up your mind and believe in your possibilities. 

So there you have it, Sex Coaches. The path to achieving your financial goals. It’s all about “The Uplevel.” Recognize that the greatest resource you have in this journey to financial success is your mindset and your ability to persevere. Choose a financial goal, accept that the journey will have its ups and downs, get guidance from your “Super Self,” ask for what you want, and be prepared to receive. But most of all, believe in yourself and enjoy the process of “The Uplevel.”


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